Dishonour Read online

  Freddie laughed ruefully. ‘Stop wasting my fucking time. You really have been watching too many movies. I don’t need to listen to this kind of shit now.’

  The urgency in Eddie’s voice stopped Freddie walking away completely. ‘I ain’t asking to come and rub suntan lotion on yer back. Once I’m out, we go our separate ways. Listen, we can do this. What I can’t do is spend the next few years rotting away behind bars because of my missus. I have the contact but I don’t have the readies.’

  ‘How much exactly are we talking?’

  ‘Two hundred grand; maybe a bit more.’

  ‘That sounds okay, but how will you be able to get in the same van as me?’

  ‘I’ve thought about that. On the morning of you going to see Ray-Ray, there’ll need to be a fight on the wing. I need to get hurt. Hurt enough for the medics not to be able to deal with it here, but not hurt enough for them to call an ambulance. You’ll have to have someone break my arm. The wing will go into lock down whilst they check me over. Obviously you’ll be delayed as well. When they realise it’s broken, they’ll call the security firm to take me. I can sort it for my contact to make sure there aren’t any other vans available that morning. And in this day of lags suing the prison authorities, they ain’t going to have me hanging around whilst I’m screaming lawsuits. Then, knowing your van is coming for you, they’ll probably put me in with you.’

  ‘Probably?’

  ‘Well there’s the possibility they might not, but what I thought was, if you put a squeeze on that muppet of a deputy governor who you’ve got sucking shit out of your arse, you can make sure I’m on the van.’

  ‘And what if I can’t? What if I can’t swing it for you to be on the van?’

  ‘Then at least we tried, but you’ll still have a chance of getting away.’

  Freddie watched Eddie watching him. It not only sounded good, it also sounded like there could be a chance of them pulling it off, albeit a small one; but as Eddie had said, what did they have to lose? He could easily sort out his men to haul up the van with shooters if they knew which route they were going, and the money wasn’t a problem.

  With one flash of his gleaming white teeth, Freddie Thompson grinned. ‘Okay Ed, let’s do it.’

  11

  Ray-Ray Thompson was only half listening to the blonde haired nurse talk as she changed his dressings. He liked her. She’d been kind to him, comforting him when he was crying out in pain, staying with him as he screamed out from the nightmares. Now she was telling him about her boyfriend. From what he could gather he was a bit of a player and no more in love with her than he was in love with his teacher, though he wasn’t going to say so. Who was he to spoil anyone’s dreams? As the nurse chatted away, Ray-Ray thought about Laila. He missed her. Everything about her he missed. Her smile, her laugh, the way her eyes danced when she looked at him.

  There was a part of him that wanted to make sure she was safe. But how was he going to find out? He couldn’t ask his mother. He didn’t want her knowing anything about Laila. Then a thought came to him. He spoke, interrupting the nurse in mid flow, complaining about the lack of text messages her boyfriend had sent.

  ‘Can you do me a favour?’

  The nurse looked at Ray-Ray in surprise, slightly put out she hadn’t finished her story.

  ‘Yes, of course.’

  ‘I want you to go and see somebody for me …’

  Tasha Thompson stretched, forgetting where she was for a moment. Imagining being back in Soho in her absurdly expensive handmade bed with Freddie lying next to her, and Ray-Ray sleeping safely in the next bedroom. But as the summer sun forced its way through the gap in the curtains, reality seized hold of her.

  She turned her head and saw she was alone in the bed. Sitting up, she quickly rubbed her eyes. There, in the corner of the room, perched on the edge of the cream embroidered chair was Arnold. In the dimness Tasha couldn’t make out his face properly, only the stillness of his body and the stillness of his stare. A chill ran down her.

  ‘Arnold?’ There was no answer; merely the murmur of voices outside in the distance. ‘Arnold, you’re frightening me.’

  Arnold’s tone was as still and unmoving as his physical presence. ‘I’ve been watching you sleep. So still, so very still.’

  He got up, walking slowly towards Tasha. Crouching down in front of her he smiled. ‘You’re perfect. Just perfect.’

  Tasha laughed, her cockney accent cutting through the air. ‘Stop being a soft git; you must be bleeding on something. I’m hardly God’s gift.’

  Arnold tilted his head to one side, catching a beam of sunshine on his cheek. ‘Oh but you are to me, you really are.’

  She stared at him, always surprised at how beautiful he really was. She could stare at him all day. For a start, he certainly didn’t realise how good-looking he was and how many heads he turned when he walked down the street. He was tall, almost six foot five. Wavy blonde and honey-brown hair. Big green eyes with a mesmerising stare. His face was square and chiselled with a wind-tanned complexion. His body was naturally muscular yet he showed no vanity, wearing clothes befitting of a man twenty years his senior. Bleeding hell, her granddad, God bless his soul, wouldn’t even have been seen dead in the shirts she’d seen Arnold in. Though perhaps that was what she liked and trusted about him. Quite why he would choose her, when he could quite frankly have the pick of any woman, she didn’t know. Stroking Arnold’s face without saying anything, Tasha got up from the bed, heading towards the bathroom. He was sweet, but compliments made her feel uncomfortable. What she really wanted to do was get showered then go straight to the hospital.

  She picked up her phone. It was on silent. There were eighteen missed calls. One from her sister Linda. Seventeen from Freddie.

  ‘Why did you say I’m frightening you?’

  Tasha turned round, her thoughts preoccupied with not having answered Freddie’s calls. ‘Come again?’

  ‘Why did you say a minute ago I’m frightening you? You’re not scared of me are you?’

  ‘Scared of you? Christ almighty, I’m more likely to be scared of me own shadow. You’re the gentlest man I know Arnie, and I appreciate that.’

  ‘You called me Arnie.’

  ‘Don’t you like being called that?’

  Arnold smirked. ‘You know I do.’

  A flash of puzzlement crossed Tasha’s face for a second before disappearing into a frown. ‘I said it, because when I saw you sitting there, I thought you’d changed your mind about us. You know, perhaps you thought better of getting involved with the likes of me. I don’t know what impression I’ve given you, but I don’t do this all the time; in fact, it’s the first time I’ve done anything like this before. I ain’t ever cheated on Freddie before.’

  ‘Who’s Freddie?’

  Tasha shook her head. ‘I swear you’re worse than me with names, or maybe not listening is just a trait all men have. Freddie’s my husband’s name. Anyhow, I can’t stand here quacking. Let me get a shower, I don’t want to miss visiting time at the hospital.’

  Arnold stood up, walking over to Tasha. He grabbed her arm gently, stopping her from going into the bathroom.

  ‘Husband?’

  ‘Yes. My husband, Arnie. The man I told you about when I met you.’

  ‘Don’t say that. Don’t spoil things. Let me hear you say that it’s only you and me.’

  Again the puzzlement crossed over Tasha’s face, but this time the crease in her forehead was much deeper. She held Arnold’s intense gaze. She could see he was urging her to say something but she didn’t know what. Then it slowly dawned on her what was happening. He wanted her to pretend. To role play. She and Freddie had often done it. Although her husband had cheated on her so often she’d given up counting, they still had a very healthy sex life and role playing was part of it. It was harmless fun.

  She smiled sadly at Arnie, slightly despairing at men. How could he think her mind was in the mood to play games when her heart was with Ray-Ray
in the hospital? But she supposed she should try. Arnie had been so kind to her, so supportive. She guessed it was the least she should do.

  Tasha feigned a smile and took one step towards Arnold. Her face was centimetres from his. Licking her lips she spoke in a husky voice. ‘You’re right baby; there is no husband. It’s just you and me. I just like teasing you. I can show you what a tease I am if you like.’

  Gently Arnold held Tasha’s shoulders, pushing her away. Sidestepping her, he winked, his face becoming relaxed. For just a moment he’d believed her, but then he should’ve known she was teasing because that’s what she always did. Izzy always teased.

  The water pounded down on Tasha’s skin. Even though it was July, she had the shower turned onto hot, slightly too hot. The sting of it felt refreshing, making her alert to her thoughts.

  She wanted to keep her mind off Freddie; there was nothing to be solved by thinking about him. What had happened to Ray-Ray was because of Freddie. She knew that and didn’t need to go there in her mind. It was too painful. She was furious and she could never forgive him for putting their son in so much danger. But even though he was wrong, if he found out what she was doing, it’d be over, both for her and for Arnold. The thought really hit her for the first time. She hadn’t thought of it in those terms. She hadn’t really thought about Arnold’s safety.

  She was being selfish continuing her affair with Arnold. She knew the risks. He didn’t. The problem was, she felt she needed to hold onto something; something safe, to get her through what had happened to Ray-Ray. She couldn’t cope alone – or she didn’t feel as if she could.

  Arnold was everything Freddie wasn’t. Kind and warm. He was a gentleman in the old-fashioned sense; shy almost. They’d shared a bed together several times but not actually had sex, in fact nowhere near to having sex. The nearest he’d got was a moment ago when he’d wanted her to role play.

  All Arnold had done when they were in bed was hold her close, rocking her gently and very quietly singing a song she couldn’t quite make out the words to.

  ‘He’s fucking off his bollocks. What’s wrong with him? Don’t sound normal if you ask me. Some queer boy no doubt, trying to pretend he’s not,’ was what her sister Linda had said when Tasha told her that they hadn’t slept together.

  ‘Not everyone wants to get their bleeding leg over Linda.’

  ‘Show me a man that don’t, and I’ll show you a corpse.’

  ‘Oh God, everything in life ain’t about sex you know Lind.’

  ‘Clearly bleeding not. Just be careful Tash, he don’t sound all there to me.’

  Tasha hadn’t said anything to Linda, but not having sex with Arnold had at first felt very strange. She’d worried there was something wrong with her; worried he didn’t find her attractive. But after a while it felt quite refreshing. Refreshing that Arnold didn’t want her for her body. He was kind in his words, complimented her even though it made her feel uncomfortable, and he didn’t want her for sex, he simply wanted her for her.

  ‘Can’t we go even a little faster Arnie? You’ve got the whole of bleeding Bradford lined up behind you.’ They were in the car and Tasha was desperate to see Ray-Ray.

  Arnold looked in his rear view mirror and saw over a dozen cars bumper to bumper, following him as he did a steady thirty miles per hour. ‘I don’t think being pulled over by the police will get you to the hospital quickly. Sorry, but I have a thing about breaking rules.’

  He glanced over at her and Tasha shook her head warmly. Arnold was different from anyone she’d ever known. There was nothing complicated about him. He had an innocent simplicity. He didn’t mask who he was; the complete opposite of Freddie. For the first time in her life Tasha understood what it was like for a man to treat her with respect. ‘You’ve driven past it.’

  Tasha swivelled her body in her car seat as they drove past the hospital.

  ‘I know. I just wanted to show you something. Please.’

  ‘Can’t we do this later? I really need to go and see Ray-Ray. Besides anything else, I can’t afford to raise any suspicions and have me old man find out you’ve been staying at the hotel with me. I wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t have someone checking up. It wasn’t just because the house was damaged by the fire I’m staying there, Freddie’s told me I have to in case of any other attacks. And if Freddie tells you to do something, you do it. I just don’t think it’s safe for you darling. I ain’t told you much about Freddie but he’s not a man who likes to be crossed. Point is, I’m worried about you; I’m afraid something bad might happen because of me.’

  Tasha turned her head to see Arnold’s reaction. But he wasn’t listening and had the same faraway look in his eyes she’d often seen. There was a part of her that wanted to ask him more questions about himself. About his life. But she knew not to. Not asking questions was part of her life since as far back as she could remember. Whatever he did, it was clear he didn’t want to talk about it. He’d tell her if she needed to know. In that way he was no different to Freddie.

  ‘Arnie?’

  ‘Mmm? … Sorry, did you say something?’

  Turning away, she watched the rain from the sudden cloud burst hit against the passenger seat window. ‘No. Don’t worry darling; it was nothing important. Okay, half an hour, that’s all and then I really have to go and see Ray-Ray.’

  ‘So, you’ll let me take you?’

  ‘Looks like I’ve got no choice.’

  The flats were nondescript; a low rise block like thousands of other low rise blocks which had been built in the sixties for working families. The outside was clean, almost sterile with a few trees lining the pathway to the communal front door and Tasha was struggling to conjure up any enthusiasm for the place. ‘Is this what you wanted to show me Arnie, a concrete block of flats?’

  Aware it was almost midday, she glanced at her emerald-encrusted Rolex, a treat to herself after finding Freddie humping one of the little tarts from Frankie Taylor’s club, a good friend of Freddie’s and a known face back in Soho.

  ‘No, of course not. You should know me better than that. Today’s the day. 28, 7, 98. Remember?’

  Tasha frowned. Arnold was forever quoting numbers at her. It was one of his little quirks. She’d given up asking him what they represented a while ago, after one too many long-winded explanations. It was odd to Tasha to see anyone love numbers the way he did, lighting up when he talked about them as if someone had just given him the biggest diamond on Bond Street. She’d always hated maths at school and even now it took a calculator for her to work out the simplest of sums. Yet Arnie seemed to have a passion for numbers, seeing an equation to solve or a pattern of numbers in the most ordinary of things.

  Arnie was looking at her with expectation. ‘Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten?’

  Shit. She’d no idea what he was talking about, but the look in his eyes told her it was something important; something which mattered and something she’d clearly forgotten. Was it his birthday? She wasn’t great with all that stuff at the best of times, and with the added anxiety of Ray-Ray it must have gone clean out of her head. Actually, she couldn’t even recall the conversation they’d had about it. Still, she didn’t want to hurt him and let on she’d forgotten. He’d been so good to her.

  ‘Oh course I remember silly … Today’s the day.’ Tasha smiled weakly, hoping Arnold wouldn’t pick up on the fact she wasn’t entirely sure what she was supposed to be getting excited about.

  ‘Come on then. I can see you want to get on with it,’ Arnold said as he opened the driver’s door. He paused and leaned back in. Reaching across to the back seat, he smiled as he grabbed the twisted rope from the back seat.

  Inside, the flats were just as spotless as the outside of them, with a smell reminding Tasha of the hospital; the place she should really be getting back to.

  Arnold had gone ahead in front of her and from the stairwell, she could hear the sound of him opening his front door. Sighing, she continued to make her way up the sta
irs, hoping that they could leave soon.

  ‘Jesus, Arnie, what’s that smell?’ Tasha walked into Arnold’s flat covering her nose.

  ‘You can smell it too?’

  ‘Yeah.’

  Arnold blinked. ‘Really?’

  ‘Too bleeding right I can, open one of them windows darlin’. I reckon you must have a blocked drain. Haven’t you reported it?’

  ‘Thought perhaps it was just me, so I didn’t want to cause a fuss.’

  ‘Arnie, you’re a sweetie but Christ, sometimes you’ve really got to grow a bleeding pair. You ain’t getting nothing done in this life if you can’t give it a bit of bollocks when you need to. I’ll get them to sort it. Where’s the number for the management office?’

  ‘Over there on the table next to the phone. There’s a list of numbers.’

  Tasha walked across to the table. The place was tiny. She didn’t know what she’d been expecting, but certainly not this. Apart from the smell, the place was pristine. Nothing seemed to be out of place. The row of cups she could see in the small kitchenette were lined up with regimental precision and she watched as Arnold straightened the last mug, making sure the handle was turned the same way as the others.

  The brown kitchen worktops gleamed nearly as brightly as the stainless steel sink did. And the two tea towels left on top were folded up into what Tasha could only describe as an origami type bird.

  Catching Arnold staring at her, she smiled back, feeling slightly annoyed at the length of time it was taking for the phone to be answered.

  Walking out of the kitchenette, Arnold watched her from the back. Her blonde hair was tied up in a high ponytail, giving him a glimpse of her neck. Smooth, long and beautiful.

  Arnold tightened his grip on the rope. Perhaps he wouldn’t need it. Maybe she’d be happy to stay. She seemed so keen. So helpful.

  He didn’t know why, but he could feel his breath beginning to become shallow. The drips of sweat were prickling at his skin and running down his forehead. His palms were wet, causing the texture of the rope to feel rougher on his hands. Taking one step closer to her, he shut his eyes. He was ready.